believe

i'll be good,
i'll be mature,
i'll be patient,
i'll be lovely

don't ever worry about me;
i'll be allrite, i promise;
i'll try my best to hold this tears..
when i started to get jealous

don't say a word,
i'll understand,
i know you do it for our own goods
i'll be understanding

reff:
do what you think is right;
and i'll agree with that
cos i believe in you
and forever i will

bridge:
i'll wait,
i'll wait
the time will answer,
and i believe.. we're meant to be.

terima kasih cinta :)

kyahahaha.. im happy todayyy.. finally recorded! akhirnyaaa..
thanks for all cinta2ku.. saudara seiman, saudara sejiwa.. terserah dhe.. thanks pokonya..
kyahahah.. akhirnya siap launch juga nanti early october lagu ini..
thanks for all the efforts that u guys have put in.. hahaha maap klo saya cembetut depan2nya n ngomel klo g ada soulnya.. tp at the end nyanyi2nya pada bagus kok.. the audiences feel loved :)
thanks to the composer.. ko yoab.. to my editor + my singer.. dupek NAFSU.. and my kipar as the drummer.. last but not least.. the guitar player skaligus yg menyediakan tempat rekaman.. hahaha tengkyu koko bayi besar elek! =P
the song sounds lovely and im happy :) tp lebi happy lagi kalo es tellernya dibungkus & dbagi2 wkt rekaman.. LOL

p.s mangganya enakkkkkkk ;) kyahahaha...

ayo bkin lagu kedua lagiii^^

atas nama cinta

hari ini.. byk sharing ttg cinta.. ttg Mr.B yang dibutakan oleh cinta, dan tentang mr.D yang bilang "i dont worth those sacrifices".
ada perbedaan yg significant dr 2 orang ini.. yg satu rela melakukan apa aja demi cinta.. well smoga aj beneran cinta.. mo dsuru lompat kali aja mau mungkin.. 1 lagu tidak mau orang berantem/berkorban demi dia.. katanya he doesn't worth it.
well.. susah dbilang mana yg bener mana yg salah.. mana yg cinta mana yg nafsu..
mnurut ak, stiap orang itu dasarnya memang sudah berbeda, mereka py porsi masing2, py batas masing2, dan py cara sndiri2.. ada org yg suka extreme love, ada yg suka jian jian dan dan de ai.. klo ditanya mana yg bodoh mana yg bijak.. susah jawabnya, cos there is no right or wrong to love.
cuma.. coba check & kenali diri kita.. type mana kita?? kenali diri kita, kenali medan, baru susun strategy perang! ;)

23.9.08

kyahahaa.. i supposed to wake up at 8 and attend class.. but i ended up wake up at 11.. and i was like... "syuttt i need to go somewhere"
i was supposed to go accompany mr.D to Bedok to meet ms.G, but there was no text reply on my phone so i was like, " maybe he's still sleeping.. so why don't i go back cuddle with my bolster?" LOL
then my phone rang at 12+.. mr.D said he's already on his way, & never received my text msg.. *duarrr* we just found out that the text was successfully sent; but mr.H opened it when mr.D was away to the bathroom and so mr.D didn't know if there's any text got in. ok.. 1st miss communication of the day..
thennn i rushed to get ready and managed to get a cab.. 2nd problem.. i have no idea which part of bedok i shall go to.. is it north or south.. so allrite, let's just drop @ MRT. wishing that the Mc.D is visible from there.
when the cab stopped, i was like "where is the mrt station?" i didn't see any station here.. what i saw is only HDB blocks and supermarket lol.
"where on earth am i actually at??" -.-"
saving my integrity, and i didnt wish mr.D to call me stupid, so i tried to go around and find where on earth the Mc.D is, or at least let me find the MRT station. Poorly, i can only found banks, and market.. Scared to get lost in the market, i decided to humbly call mr.D.. he tried to explain how to get to Mc.D but i still couldn't find the way to get there.. danggg.. i think my sense of direction is really2 low! +.+
it was 2mins before i met mr.D next to the market.. and my lovely phone dropped.. it jumped out from its case, and the battery ran over the floor.. shoot!! well, i know im going to change my casing soon.. but doesn't mean i can drop my phone rite?? argghhh
thennnn we made a decision to go to the city, to do some shopping.. *danggg! city is only 10 mins from my home man, and im already at this desserted land called Bedok which is bloody far!*
ok.. so we took MRT ( i found out that the mrt station is actually located at the back of that supermarket) to Dhoby Gaut to and met mr.H there.
i remembered that we only went up & down the escalator @ PS then we moved to Bugis. hahaha at least we can take photobooth there.. gezz.. i've become very narcist lately.. what have i eaten, huh?? my happy time started at Bugis.. because we took pics :P for ur information, mr.H hates taking pics, and to get him into the box takes some times..
but we did take pics and i got that angel & demon pic.. the pic that i've eying from a long time ago.. but never get it.. cos they always want to take that boring comic pics..-.-
after thatttt shopping time.. buttt hmphh you know, its Bugis! hard to find ATM machine, and they don't do NETS/VISA/MASTER there.. arghh u know that im not a cash type person.. sooo this troubled me.. btw i ended up buying 3 tees.
done with the shopping and the butts started to ache, we decided to go to swensen's to hit the chair and satisfy the tummy. and yesss.. mr.D brought an outside food, and the manager asked us not to consume it inside.. buttt its gonna melt if we dont consume it directly! soo mr.H quarreled with the manager.. kyahahaha.. what a day lol!
we ordered like A LOT.. till the table was so full and we couldn't finish the food..
then i went home.. the bus took like forever!
on top of all, today is CSL's bday.. and i didn't go to my fiance' house for surprise due to my very late wake up timeeee! arghhh.. really man, what a day!
tomorrow should really be better than today........

love shows me everything

remember the first time i met you,
the way you touched my heart,
the way you handled me with love,
was the time i realize the purpose of my life

this feeling in my heart
has grown so deep
dunno when did it start
how did i fall for U?

bridge:
Love shows me everything
love is never wrong
You're the heaven sent

Reff:
i need U
i love U
You're the reason I live

I don't know how to show it
But i know i love you
Cos' You're all the reason that i need..
...to love.

inspirations..

im tired and i really miss my blanket n i really want to cuddle with my bolster!
dangg.. but i need to at least.. get a story, to be put nicely in a poem/lyrics.
i normally get my inspirations from everywhere.. even from my community. i ussually love to sit alone on the toilet bowl or sitting in the middle of the basketball court to get inspired..
but latelyyy thank God that i don't need to do that anymore, sometimes inspiration just comes; and its ready to be made as poems.
but todayyyy was really different. i even decided to go to sentosa island to find inspirations there.. sitting in the cable car, enjoying the view, wishing to get inspired. butttt nothing crossed my mind!
danggg.. i really need to get out from the box, i really need inspirations, and i really need to start writting. im hoping for heaven sends.. =P

special

i love being on the stage, i love being in the crowd, i love talking in front of a lot of people, i love walking in front and leads the group, i am me; with a high self confidence.. at least that's what i normally think and that's what people think as well.
it's very easy to gain self confidence when you're facing someone/people who are (or at least you think) "less" than you. You'll feel more weighted and feel better therefore you can be so confidence. one of my "wrong'' key to my self confidence is simple, is to take your conversation partner or whoever you need to face and think of them as they are more stupid than you. no matter how clever they are. this way, you're mouth will still speak out its words and your feet will not shake.
but facing somebody who you exactly know is more clever, more experienced, or whatever "more" than you, you'll feel very small. the more you feel amazed with your speaking partner, the more you don't dare to speak cos you're afraid that you'll sound silly.
i saw this good quote that i uploaded as the head of my post, one of its lines says that every person has something that no one else has. sounds great and powerful, rite?
even the one person whom you think is the stupidest person alive on earth has something that you don't have, and that person whom you woo a lot, whom you admire a lot, whom you think is the best and the most perfect creature on earth doesn't have what you have..
everyone is unique, and is equipped with something that only he/she has, and everyone is special.
therefore its not right to be small hearted as well as is not right to think that you're better compared to someone else. everyone is equivalent, and everyone is special.
treat everyone the same, and don't close your heart while your eyes are widely opened.
treasure everyone, cherish all the moments that you have with them; then you'll then find out how special are they actually are. :)

I WISH YOU WERE HERE..

i dig my toes into the sand,
the ocean looks like a thousand
diamonds strew and across a blue blanket
i lean against the wind, pretend..
that i’m weightless!
that i’m happy.. HAPPY!!

i lay my head onto the sand,
the sky resembles a black lit canopy with holes punch in it
i’m counting UFO’s.. signal them with my lighter,
and at this moment i’m happy.. happy!

this world’s a roller coaster,and i’m not strapped in.
maybe i should hold with care, but my hands are busy in the air!
I WISH YOU WERE HERE.

..........................................................................................................................................................................

maybe i just miss you too much, good pal!

take care.. and always remember this:
"we'll be fine" no matter what circumstances we'll face in front
and besties will always stay besties cos friendship isn't determined by the distance, and anyway it's just a flight away! forget about the distance, remember the good old laughters that we shared :)

lessthanthree

Today, I bet my life
You have no idea
What I feel inside.
Don’t be afraid to let it show
For you’ll never know
If you let it hide.

I love you,
take this gift, and don’t ask me why.
Cause if you will let me..
I’ll take what scares you,
and hold it deep inside.
And if you ask me why I’m with you,
why I’ll never leave;
Love will show you everything..
that’s the only thing that i can tell.

thank you to the dearest you.

for all the thoughts that i've had, for all tears that i’ve shed, for all the troubles that had happened to me and i had overcome, for all the precious life lessons i’ve learned from you nothing i can give back apart from the meaningless word of thank you.
i’ve got so much from you, if i can say, you’re all the resources that i need to stay alive, and you’re the God sent. you may not look dazzling and different when i first met you. you’re just another human, who will draw another friendship story in my life.
as times goes by, i can never stop learning from you, from the time that we have shared, the joy that we’ve got together, the tears that we’ve shed, the pain that we’ve felt, the coincidences that we shared, and the God that we have been worshiping together. there is one thing that i can see very clearly, indirectly or directly; you’re always there. i don’t care if many say you’re just kind, but for me you’re the God sent. and if before i have never had the chance to see and feel it earlier, i feel guilty. For the chance that i’ve wasted stupidly, i’m truly sorry. for the love that i never care about before, i feel very troubled. let me tell you one secret, i can be like today mostly is because of you. i’ve learned most from you, your dedication, your love for others, your golden heart, those things that i’ve never realized before now become the most precious things that im eying for. i shouldn’t go for looks, cos they deceive. i shouldn’t go for wealth cos even that fades away. i shouldn’t go for health, cos nobody can run away from old sickness.i should go for love, and thanks He reminds me of that.
if i can have the chance to tell you before you tell me, let me be the first to tell you; you’re someone meaningful, and you’ve changed people or at least me to a better way. if i can choose to keep an accompany till i die, i’ll stick with God’s choice and favor you no matter what variable changes i’ll see in the future. even if you become a poor, even if you can’t use your eyes anymore, i can be your eyes. even if you become a handicapped, i can be your feet. as long still you still have the heart for me and for God i’ll still stick with you. you and your family shared smiles and tears with me and maybe that’s the best "sharing" moments i have ever had. thank you for everything. me and Jesus love you.

andai saja aku bisa lebih dikenal..

*this post was taken from my old blog too. but i kinda like it and would like to share it with you, bloggers and readers.. uppsss.. its in indonesian unfortunately! sorry for the inconvenience. :(

_______________________________________________________________

HIDUP, banyak yang bilang itu berkah; banyak yang bilang itu hukuman.
dalam hidup banyak hal yang akan membuat kita tertawa, menangis, menggerutu, tersenyum, gembira, ato bahkan membawa kita pada kematian.
apa yang bisa membuat kita bahagia?
kita bahkan bisa kesulitan memberi definisi bahagia. banyak orang bisa berkata "saya bahagia" tanpa tau apa arti bahagia itu sendiri. saya sendiripun bingung apa arti sebenarnya dari bahagia, saya cuma tau saat ada orang yg perhatian sama saya, saya bahagia. saat ada orang yg mencintai saya, saya bahagia. saat saya lebih diberkati dari orang lain, saya bahagia. saat saya bisa menjadi berkat bagi orang lain, saya bahagia.. aku bisa tulis essay tentang apa saja hal yang membuatku bahagia, tanpa tahu definisi pasti dari bahagia. satu yang bisa aku bilang, bahagia adalah satu perasaan yang membuat kita jadi lebih bersemangat, satu perasaan dimana kita merasa bersyukur bisa merasakannya.

pernah mengalamin kebahagiaan yang bercampur dengan penderitaan?
aku pernah. sebut saja contoh kongkritnya, sahabat. aku punya satu sahabat cewek, orangnya baik, berpendirian, tapi menurutku dia satu orang yg justru kurang mengenal aku. dia selalu memperlakukanku dengan hal2 yang menurut dia baik, dia menyanyangiku menurut caranya, dia membagikanku semua yang dia punya, mungkin tanpa dia tahu apa sebenarnya yang aku butuhkan.
mungkin aku dosa bilang dia tak mengenal hatiku, karena aku sndiri tak pernah bercerita tentang siapa aku. tapi perlukah itu? i thought a good friend hears even the unspoken..
tanpa dia sadari, sering dia membuatku cemburu. well, kasih itu tidak cemburu, dia juga tidak marah. tapi bukannya aku sendiri juga masi manusia biasa yang juga belum bisa mengasihi dengan sempurna?
kata-katanya yang mungkin menurut dia cuma sekedar kalimat ringan yang dia lontarkan dengan senyum mengumbar, mungkin terdengar biasa saja; tapi buatku kadang itu bisa menjadi sumber air mataku. apakah aku yang kurang tegar?
tidak jarang aku harus mengalah, berpura2 bahagia dengan semuanya. tapi sampai kapan aku bisa lepas semua topeng? bukan aku tak mau mengalah, tapi semua hal yang paling aku sukai, paling aku sayangi, paling aku idam2kan.. semua sudah aku bagi. tapi dia tidak pernah merasa kalau itu pemberian terbesar yang bisa aku beri, mungkin bukan sesuatu yang berharga bagi dia, tapi berarti seluruh dunia menurutku.
ahh.. andai saja aku bisa lebih dikenal lebih baik..

p.s : kadang aku berpikir, apa guna 1000 teman tapi tak seorangpun dari mereka mengenalmu? aku memilih 1 teman baik yang mengenalku luar dalam.

girls vs guys

i copied-pasted it from my previous blog.. and wish i can share it here. this kinda lame, but i like it because it speaks about reality. ow yah, i forgot to tell you; im easily disgusted by hypocrites!

do girls need guys more, or guys need girls more? there’ll be an endless answer to it.
practically, they need each other; that’s true.
girls can’t live without guys, and the same thing apply to guys. but why is that so?
the main theory is just that you can’t live alone. i highlighted the word alone here because it said alone, not the opposite sex.
thinking logically, girls can live with the help of other girls, no guys help needed. isn’t that true? well, of course get real; take out that thinking about making offspring and so on, i know that can only be happen with the help of the opposite sex.
but apart from making offspring, technically we can live without the opposite sex, true?

i’m just trying to be open, and get honest with myself; this theory doesn’t resemblance me at all. there are times when i think that life would be much more happier if i’m the only girl alive in this world, and the rest are guys. oh.. i’ll be so pampered and many will idolize me! =D
take a minute to think.. if you’re facing a problem, who will you tend to tell the first? will it be your closest partner from the same sex or from the opp sex? let’s say you have 2 besties : Ms. A and Mr. B, and you’re a girl. who will you ring for the first time when you face troubles / you found something very interesting? who will be the first to inform? i bet it’ll be Mr. B.
well, of course making sure that problems / the interesting stuff is not a ‘girls business’ or ‘guys business’.
then.. when you feel so bloody down and you just feel trapped, who will you wish to take care and comfort you? will that be your best friend from the same sex? well ya that might be right, but it’ll help more if the friend from the opp sex is the one to pamper you, true? well.. i just don’t want to be a hypocrite and telling this openly.
im a girl, so i first thought that guys are superheroes. they can easily cheer girls up, do things that girls can’t do. but after i take a deeper look, same thing apply to guys.
guys too, they feel that the opp sex are angels, the helping hands that they always wish for.

all these while i’ve been thinking, and i couldn’t find the answer for this mystery. why is that so? why are we easily touched and attracted by the opp sex and things couldn’t apply the same to the same sex.. why is that so? well, im not talking about that love relationship.. but, you know..

..
have you ever been in the situation where you’re away with a group of friends, and all of them are your friends from the same sex. well you can go cheers and be happy, but don’t you feel something is missing?

let’s get to a real example. my best friend broke up a while ago.. when she broke up, i tried to comfort her, i tried to text her, i tried to ring her.. on the phone she said, "im busy right now, i’ll ring you back in short while." & i waited for the call for hours till i decided to call again, then she answered quickly and said, "i’ve got to go to work, i’m sorry but i’ve to hung up, maybe next time then we can chat." that time, honestly i feel a bit sad cos she didn’t accept my good deeds. but at the same time i’m happy, she’s busy and so she might not have the time to be sad and to remember about this stupid guy who pissed her off. but then i still feel that this won’t do, so i texted my girl-friend who is also her good friend, and asked her to comfort her too. she did text her, but there was no reply too. we tried to call her online on msn and there was only a short reply.. the image that we got it’s like she didn’t want to talk much that time, and we are ok with that.
after a while i figured out that right after she broke up, she called this particular guy (her guy-friend) and cried to this guy and told him about anything, and he comforted her.
after that he (this guy-friend) texted me asking me to take care of her cos she needs accompanion desperately. i told him the situation that i had already tried but i found her running away from me, same thing to my other girl-friend.
from that day, we know during that down season of her, she didn’t really need us to comfort her. she just need us to listen to all her stories, and so she can feel a bit light. but she doesn’t really need us to pamper her. instead she needs a guy-friend to comfort her, not a girl-friend.
well, you might say that my friend is cheeky and naughty. but take a look at yourself.. have you ever been in her position and what did u do? aren’t you just the same like her..?
i asked my self this question, and i got the same reply to what she did. maybe if i was her, i will not need a girl-friend at that time to accompany me, instead i might need a guy-friend to comforts me. not because im hunger for the guys’ touch, but you know… i can say that guys understand girls better than girls understand girls. don’t you guys think the same way too? girls understand you guys more than boys understand you. isn’t that true?

one more concrete example, you’re facing this current problem, and 2 people give you solutions. one is ms.A and the other one is ms.B, if you’re a girl you’ll tend to listen to mr.A more, you’ll take this solutions heavily and really put that to mind. isn’t that so?
thinking about all these.. i can never stop wondering why.. WHY??
that’s a mystery that live keeps.

now i began to understand why God created Eve to accompany Adam, not Adi, or any guy.. because most of the time, we need the opp sex more than we need our friends from the same sex. don’t talk about marriage, don’t talk about love, it still that way, it’s the same law apply.
girls couldn’t live without guys, and guys can’t live without girls. no wonder they make the perfect match. =)

…… life is full of mystery. that is also why girls fight more with guys too, not with girls. all the stitches in girls heart mostly made by guys, not girls.. and the same thing apply to guys too. isn’t that true?
the opposite sex : the source of happiness and the source of all the sorrows and sadness.

but let’s take a look at this equation:
HAPPINESS + SADNESS = LIFE

ahaha.. you know what i mean! =P

soft launch

i've been thinking.. shall i create a new blog? and this blog is the answer to it.
i'll not update my previous (friendster) blog again, because i think nobody reads friendster blog anymore. kyahaha..
so let's switch to blogger! have fun blogging for all users and readers :)
and i hope that im welcomed here.
have a fantastic day and stay blessed, people :)

love,
me.